Monday, June 29, 2009

dr. no fun

i know i have lots of blogging to catch up on... ireland was awesome, and i'll get to it soon... it's just hard to keep up a blog when you don't have internet at home. i quit blogging at work when i left my government job :)

quick story though.

i went to the doctor last week for my annual physical, blood work and all (i hate needles... unless it's for acupuncture). i'm pretty healthy. my blood pressure couldn't have been better. i haven't seen my doctor since last year's appointment... no need to.

at some point she asked me, "are you working out?" i said yes. she asked, "what are you doing?"

i told her i was training for triathlons, swimming, biking and running every week.

her response? "are you lifting weights?"

"um... only during the winter..."

"well you really ought to be lifting weights. you need to build muscles to strengthen your bones and guard against osteoporosis."

since when does swimming, biking and running NOT build muscle? what?

then she asked if i smoke: no. drink caffeine: very little. drink alcohol: yes.

she said, "you really need to watch your alcohol intake as a woman to be sure you keep your calorie count down."

ok... first... do i look like i'm concerned about calories? did i mention i work out? and shouldn't you be more worried about the alcohol portion of the equation versus the calorie intake?

crazy talk.

Sunday, June 07, 2009

las solteras

i just got back from listening to the symphony at an outdoor amphitheater with half the city, including 3 of my lovely girlfriends. it was pretty much awesome. a "country" theme, with several singalong tunes. but even more awesome was the drama that one likely encounters as a single girl in the city.

here's juanita's story.

(don't you just love how i hispanify all my names??)

so there we were, the 4 of us, sitting on a darling white table cloth with blue trim and yellow fruit accents (pears, maybe)... sipping wine from our lovely picnic basket that sloan dawg brought along (don't know how to hispanify that name, but as a sidebar, sloan dawg and i met at one of these outdoor symphonies last year! aw, our little anniversary party...) when juanita noticed that her ex-boyfriend's wife was sitting RIGHT next to us.

this was pretty much a non-issue till the ex's daughter noticed juanita, screamed with delight, and proceeded to talk excitedly for 5 minutes... clearly STOKED to run into her dad's former love.

mmm, see, the daughter is in high school.

because the ex is 55.

juanita is not 55.

after the show, the ex-wife walked up to us, understandably curious about the previous conversation and her daughter's connection to some stranger.

she asked if we attended the same high school.

mmm... yeah. 3 of the 4 of us are in our 30's. and 4 of the 4 of us were sipping wine. so, no. not high school buddies.

juanita gracefully stated she was a friend of the ex. at which point the ex-wife says, "oh, you didn't date him, did you????!!!!" (clearly expecting a "no" response). juanita cannot tell a lie, so she sat there, mouth slightly open, searching for the right response... "um, it was a long time ago..." meanwhile, the horrified daughter shouted, "MOM!!!!"

oh well.

we (the girls, not the ex-wife) talked about the inconvenience of age differences. if only 55 were just a number. but it's not. it's got implications. bummer.

10 minutes later, some dude, some young dude, walked up to talk to us. too young. he gaped in disbelief to find he was 10 years younger than his target. he carded her to be sure. but as previously stated, juanita can only speak the truth. ah, the numbers game again.

in the end, juanita went home to her loyal loving dog, a tad short on drama. happy ending? it's fuzzy math.

regardless, it was a good girls' night out.